So it’s official today, I am thirty. Sounds weird saying that but can I tell y’all a little secret? I’m excited about it. Besides 16,18 and 21.. I haven’t looked forward to a birthday and getting older. But this one’s a little different for some reason. I get to reflect on a decade in my 20’s and really digest what I’ve learned and where I want to grow in my 30’s. My amazing family and friends surprised me with hands down one of the best nights of my life last night to ring in this new decade. So today, I wanted to share my 30 things I’ve learned in my twenties.
1. Life is short, drink more wine. It’s made of grapes, it’s technically fruit is full of antioxidants. Just go with it.
2. Surround yourself with positive people. Let the negative ones go.
3. As the great Maya Angelou once said, “When someone shows you who they are, believe them the first time.” Actions really do speak louder than words. Good lord, can I get an amen?
4. Be kind. Kindness matters.
5. Get enough sleep. 90% of the time I feel better about almost everything with a good nights sleep.
6. Take care of yourself. Self-care is not selfish; it’s necessary. Only when you take care of you are you truly able to care for others. This one I’ve had to figure out the hard way. After I had Sophie I carried a lot of mom guilt, I couldn’t get a consistent routine working out and working. I had to learn balance and how important it was to take care of myself.
7. Make time for your girlfriends. We needed them in high school and college (what would we have done without them?!), but I truly believe that we need our girlfriends even more now then ever. We need to commiserate with them, celebrate with them, cry with them, and laugh ‘til we cry with them. And we need to just be us with them, not mothers or wives or employees or bosses or caretakers — just us.
8. Let it go.
9. Unplug once in a while. Emails can wait, to-do lists can wait, but moments may be lost. Get out there and enjoy your kids, your spouse, your animal babies, your friends, the world.
10. Learn how to say NO. You need to protect your time so that you have time for what, and who, really matters — including you.
11. Accept people for who they are. You can’t change everyone.
12. Don’t miss the chance to tell someone you love them. You never know what tomorrow brings.
13. Money doesn’t buy happiness.
14. Stop comparing yourself to others. In a social media, attention seeking world it’s so easy to compare yourself to others. Just stop. You’re perfect without the tan, fake eyelashes and a million filters. I promise.
15. Support other women, encourage them, remind them how incredible they are. This world is tough enough, and we need to stick together.
16. Be okay with sometimes not being okay. I used to think smiling and always saying it is great was what was expected. Maybe it’s a southern thing. But honestly, it’s okay to embrace the mess, the chaos, and the heartbreak.. take it in. It will make you appreciate true happiness.
17. People are in our lives for a reason – a season or a lifetime. Sometimes it’s hard to realize which category someone goes in — and that can lead to some tough moments — but this is so incredibly true. Once you understand this, you’ll be way better off.
18. Sorry is an action word. Anyone can utter the words I am sorry. A true apology is supported with changed behavior. (can I get an AMEN?)
19. Listen to people when they talk to you. Truly listen.
20. Time with your kids will go faster than you think. I remember wanting to rip my hair out multiple times catching kids vomit or poop or lord knows what, or not sleeping or just wanting to scream and lock myself in the bathroom with a bottle of wine and a straw, thinking… can we just fast forward time?! The joke is on us. Those people who snarkily said, “the days are long but the years are short,” were right. (I hate admitting that!) Create memories, traditions and meaningful moments with these babies while they still appreciate us, reach for our hands in public, and want to snuggle.
21. Other people’s opinions are mostly irrelevant. I learned the hard way if someone wants to invest their time gossiping or saying nasty things about me, let them. It doesn’t matter and it says way more about them than it is about me. YOU decide your self worth. YOU. Just as I’ve heard my momma say “stay in your lane,” I do the same. I’ll be honest, I have a people pleasing mentality, so there have been times I’ve of course been hurt by others, but it’s such a good life lesson.
22. Skincare is everything. 40 is the new 30 right? I want to look that way in 10 years at least.
23. Caffeine is life. How did we get through our younger days without a mid-afternoon, pick-me-up?
24. Be someone who makes your community better. In church our pastor talks about how you gain so much more by serving others. Boy is he right.
25. Stop getting so worked up about the little stuff. A year (or even a week) from now, most of this will not matter. That thing you’re stressing about now, is it something that will be irrelevant next week? Will it be so far off your radar in a few months from now? Then don’t give it power now. Worry when you need to worry, and until then…. bring it down a notch.
26. Being home before 11 pm is seriously awesome. I’ve always been an old soul as my friends say but I love getting up early and feeling great in the mornings. Plus, momma always said nothing good happens after midnight.
27. Listen to your body. No one knows your body better than you. If you think something is wrong, pursue it.
28. Spoil your kids, with love, your time, hugs and kisses, and with experiences. Spoil them as much as you can, for as long as you can. The truest thing I’ve come to know about parenting is this: the days are long but the years are short. Treasure every moment with your adorable little monsters.
29. Create your own luck. by working hard; believing in yourself; surrounding yourself with positive, supportive people; and having the right attitude.
30. Learn from the past, live in the present, and know the best is yet to come.
Thanks for reading along!